This is the time of year when painful emotions can overwhelm us if we do not stay alert. An unexpected setback can leave us hopelessly resentful of the holiday mood we see about us.
If you would like to improve your chances of getting through the holidays unscathed, try letting go of the past for a moment and consider what might happen if you got a fresh start.
Right now. Right here, as you sit reading this. Ask yourself this? If you could make one change in what you are doing. What would it be?
If you can't think of a change without getting into heavy shame, blame and regret, you need to cut back on the gradient. For you, the right question might be, is there anything at all that you can do without making things worse?
Assuming that you are still able to read at this point, I want you to consider what effect making this change or doing this thing would have on your future. I also want you to consider how not doing it would affect your future.
If you have found something which will change your life for the better, begin doing it immediately. Work out the details so that this becomes part of your normal routine. Keep your attention on things which contribute to a healthy state of mind. When the holidays are over, see what effect this has had on your disposition.
If you have been doing better, find something else you can change which will further improve your life and do it.
If you cannot think of any change you can make and everything seems hopeless, find someone who needs help and actually do something to help them!. This is a sure way to feel better about yourself when all else fails. Help someone else. If you do this and you still feel miserable, find more people to help and really help them.
Somewhere along the line, you are going to feel good about what you are doing and your morale will improve. At this point, you might be able to contemplate making some slight change in your own life to give yourself a fresh start.
The key to success is to keep things as light as possible. Do not rehash the past while listening to the beautiful sadness of country music, mournful ballads, or songs of lost loves, misery and betrayal. I know it hurts so good, but it's not good for you in the long run.
Keep busy, stay creative if you can and by all means help somebody else! You will get through the holidays in better shape than you thought possible. And...you'll be more fun to be with. That can't hurt, can it?
Good luck!
Ann thinks that if I lighten up any more, I'll float away. I don't think that sounds like such a terrible fate. Fred the Human Helium BalloonMan. I'm lensing my life through your filters. Keep it up!
Posted by: fredf | Dec 18, 2003 at 07:02 AM
Now if I could get Gale to post every day.....so soothing to read your posts (and Gail's over again) every morning now..........then I head back to my post for
a round of caustic humor....we all have a place--I certinly won't lose your's!
Posted by: oldcatman | Dec 18, 2003 at 12:00 PM
I agree completely. That's why I created a category for Zingers.
I truly enjoy a round of caustic humor, inspired satire and superbly-delivered invective with my morning latte. There are a lot of subjects that merit that kind of attention and writers who do an excellent job of skewering the people responsible.
That leaves me free to deliver serious essays in a more light-hearted manner. We all have our place in the blogging world.
I have added you to my list of must-read Zingers.
Posted by: David | Dec 18, 2003 at 12:42 PM